Honey, I'm home! Where's my dinner? Are you quite sure you've scrubbed out the latrine properly?

I can't resist.  You must forgive me for this slight deviation from the strict subject of fashion.  I see this as an understandable tangent, however, because housewives are where it's at when it comes to classic 50s fashion.

Do you not see the resemblance?  And so here I explain my reasoning:

I hate cooking.  Really I do.  It makes me miserable.  It is such a waste of time.  If it takes more effort than simply finding something in the fridge and sticking it in the microwave for 2 minutes (tops), it's not worth it.  So what in G-d's name am I doing here in the kitchen?!

I have no answer.  And that's not the point anyway.  The point is what makes cooking tolerable, which is dressing up in an apron and a rather stereotypically house-wife-y outfit (although today I've been too lazy for all that).


So in return for your unending patience with me for this slight deviation, I bestow upon you all my secret to making delicious cornbread muffins with cranberries in every bite.


Buy Jiffy cornbread muffin mix.  The end!


Just kidding! :D


But seriously.  That stuff's the best, man.  In addition to that, get some whole, not-dried cranberries.  Mix the cornbread as directed on the box, and add cranberries to taste.  LET IT SIT, JUST LIKE THE BOX SAYS TO.  If you do not follow each of those directions to a T, the little Jiffy monster will come and paint your toenails a hideous orange color while you sleep.  That, and your muffins will fall apart when you take them out of the pan.  Actually, they'll probably fall apart anyway.  That is, unless you use my super secret trick!  Spray a repulsively large amount of non-stick cooking spray (butter flavored is quite fitting) into each of the metal muffin cups.  To get the muffins out after cooking, I bang the tray on the counter a few times (which usually results in them falling apart...) or use a spoon to loosen the edges.  Generally it seems to work best if you let them cool for about 10 minutes beforehand.

Oh yes, and that disgusting butter spray also makes it much easier to clean the pan when you're all done.